Hope
by Imagined Reality
Summary: Oneshot. Kakashi reflects on just how much Team 7 has changed him. From ANBU to human. Just a drabble from Kakashi's POV. Shouldn't be any spoilers if you've gotten up to Shippuden.


Name: Hope

Oneshot / Drabble

Song: "This is Your Life" Switchfoot

Comments: This is a drabble, nothing more. Not intended to be a serious story. Took me three hours to write this thing. And at 3 am no less because it wouldn't get out of my head!!! Stupid thing...

Disclaimer: Kakashi, Nauto, Sasuke, etc Masashi Kishimoto

* * *

The past was something that was best not dwelled on. People lost were better remembered but not held close. Things that happened that could not un-happen were discarded after being drained of importance.

This is how Hatake Kakashi lived. In the years he spent building up his reputation as the Sharingan Ninja, successful missions piled on top of each other to make mountains. Kakashi was a jonin. He was one of the best, someone to be relied upon by Kohona. By it's people, it's shinobi, and it's Hokage.

Getting close to anyone was not an option. Not for him. Thousands of opportunities to reach out to others passed before him, but he took none. Getting close meant having to worry, having to wonder, having to care. Getting too close was a weakness he couldn't afford to have. That was how he slowly came to look at it as more and more people left him for the next life. Caring about another on a personal level was just something to clutter his resolve as a shinobi. It was something he didn't want.

Fate had taken what was precious to him. Fate had left him with memories and nothing more. Fate had left him to take care of himself. Fate had left him to be alone.

Slowly, he had accustomed himself to this. Fate wanted to leave him alone in this world? Fine, he would learn to be alone. It was as if he and Fate had reached an agreement. He would be alone and Fate would not bother him.

Unfortunately, Fate doesn't like Hatake Kakashi.

At least, that was how it seemed when he had been handed that mission. One he never liked, never appreciated. Did without thought and without emotion. Teaching. Of the handfuls of students he had taught, none had ever come close to him. Never too close. That was his mantra.

But somehow, this mission, these kids were different. From the moment he stepped into the same room with them, it was different. Though, being the person he was with the beliefs he had, Hatake Kakashi had thought nothing of it. He brushed the sensation off as annoyance at having to deal with another group of kids for months on end. He was a jonin, and although he knew teaching the new generation was important, he would rather do missions. More important things. Maybe an S-rank, if the opportunity came up. But anything else that being stuck with teaching this particular group of kids.

He didn't back down though. He didn't give up on the mission. He had his reputation to think about after all. He had never failed a mission. He didn't plan to ruin that over three insignificant kids. So he taught them. Challenged them, fought them, pushed them to their limit. He smiled and laughed, and hid behind his book, just like he had done for every person in Kohona. The act didn't change just for the kids. Soon, they would become chunin, and they would be out of his life. Off to be shinobi for Kohona.

It came back though. That feeling that these kids were different. He didn't know when it happened, but all too soon, they began to break through the mask that was Hatake Kakashi. These three kids. Uzamaki Naruto. Uchiha Sasuke. Haruno Sakura. In some way that even his sharingan couldn't see, they were different.

Maybe it was that very first C-rank mission, the one Naruto had demanded of the Third. The one where they escorted Tazuna back to his home. Perhaps it was that first encounter with Zabuza that made him snap. His mantra changed from 'never too close' to something else. He cared much more than he should have for their lives in that battle. He had managed to hide it behind the good of the mission. The kids couldn't tell, neither could Zabuza or Tazuna. But he could. He knew as soon as he began shouting at them to run, they had become important to them. Not just lives to protect, but comrades, even companions to value.

That was what frightened him. Him, Hatake Kakashi, the infamous Sharingan Ninja, scared for the fates of three children. Ones he had come to care for. Ones he had let get too close. Even in the midst of battle, even while that brilliant scheme to free him had been going on, his mind had halted. It began to cling to that thought, that feeling, that they were more important than students.

From that moment on, he had stopped fighting to protect his students. When he escaped the water prison thanks to their efforts, he was fighting for those he cared for. He was fighting for a reason that he himself had never thought to have. It was in those few moments, when the water fell away, that the shield he had been using to keep out the world shattered. When that shuriken had bitten into his knuckles and he had halted Zabuza in his rampage, he knew it had changed.

He began to notice, after that battle was won, that he too was changing. His smiles became more genuine by the day. Laughter was for actual bursts of joy and not forced chuckles to keep moral alive. He began reading his book less and less, opting to look over it's pages to watch the kids before him.

It was like looking into a mirror, reflecting the past back at him. It was like Fate had finally given up, and past and future were merging together into something called the present. And more bizarre yet, Hatake Kakashi found himself happy.

Every moment of Naruto's explosive energy reminded him of the Fourth. Every glimpse of Sasuke's sharingan was like looking into Obito's eyes again. Every piece of Sakura's growing determination made Rin's happy grin flash in his minds eye. He began watching them just for the sake of watching them. They had gotten under his guard, and somehow they knew it, because they wouldn't leave him alone. One of them was always pestering him. Whether it was for a new mission, more training, or simply to go out for ramen, they were always hovering around him.

Others began to notice. Gai went out of his way to tell Kakashi that he was very proud that he had finally found his youthful happiness, and that the Blue Beast would do 500 laps around Kohona if he couldn't find a way to be just as happy. Asuma and Kurenai made sure to let him know that they noticed a difference. The Third smiled knowingly at him every time Kakashi mentioned the kids. Strangely, Kakashi didn't mind the attention. It made him feel alive. It made him feel human. And suddenly, those had become good things.

Times were good in those few months. The team grew closer, more missions were accomplished better, and Kakashi was enjoying life for the first time in memory. But it couldn't last forever, although he had hoped it would. But the overwhelming call of revenge was too strong for Sasuke. It was unavoidable. But to Kakashi, completely predictable.

Sasuke left, and something shifted within Team 7. It wasn't a change that could be described, or one that was even really noticed by the kids, but to Kakashi it was plain as day. Sasuke's name was mentioned less and less. Sakura slowly overcame her childhood crush on him and became determined to find her own strength in order to bring him back. Naruto took it the worst, although he never showed it. Sasuke had been his rival and his best friend. It was Naruto who had promised to bring Sasuke home, and it had been Naruto to fail. But his determination never wavered, only grew stronger, as he did. Soon, Naruto had passed all expectations, including those of his ex-teacher.

But while his students mourned Sasuke's defection, Kakashi was still able to smile. And, ironically, it was all because of Sasuke. These kids had given him a reason to be alive, a reason to look forward to the future. They gave him a reason to enjoy other's company and to crack open his guard a bit more everyday.

Naruto… Sakura… Sasuke…

They had given him hope.


End file.
